Ruminating Slav

iGeek

What's new, pussycats? This weekend I drove down to Austin to attend my very-first Buffy Sing-a-Long, and holy crap, how much fun was that? Copious amounts of alcohol were consumed all day long, but I'm pretty sure that sitting among my people belting out, "You're the cutest of the Scoobies with your lips as red as rubies and your firm yet supple ... tight embrace!" would have been just as much fun stone-cold sober. Along similarly nerdular lines, Joss Whedon is selling himself on eBay. I plan on bidding my final paycheck, which, let's face it, might win me a glimpse of the back of Joss' head while nibbling on a cocktail weenie in the broom closet of the restaurant where the winning bidders will be wined and dined. By Joss Whedon.

So I've been watching the new Doctor Who, internets, and man alive, is it ever good. Yes, yes, go ahead and get the pointing and snickering out of your system. Rest assured that my husband sees to it that I am properly shamed every time I put on an episode. Because clearly, Mr. I-Own-Ever-Batman-Comic-Since-1962 can talk.

Are we all properly Depends-clad for tomorrow's iPhone launch? Doubly useful for both fanboy/girl squee-leaks, and for not having to leave your place in line in front of the Apple store (unless you're the chump who hired this guy, in which case, I hope he puts his shirt back on in time for the hand-off). I have called AT&T to switch my service over (promotional goodies for being a long-distance and DSL customer, don'cha know) and they're FedEx'ing me a SIM card along with a free Razr which they could not be talked out of sending. Don't think the irony of being force-fed 2004's hot cell phone for free while eagerly waiting to drop hundreds of dollars on this year's hot cell phone is lost on me. Cause it 'taint.

Good news -- daycare has been going well for Baxter! Which is good news for me since it means I don't have to spend my 12 precious free hours a week being riddled with guilt. Instead I get to do things like slog along on the treadmill and eat canned tuna fish drizzled with lemon. You got it, time for a Lifestyle Change. I have high hopes -- pounds are being dropped and self-respect is being restored. It's actually easier than I thought it would be since I'm not nearly as tempted as I would have been pre-Baxter when we went out to eat a lot more. So there you go, gentle readers, I'm putting it out there and making it official. Now the shame will keep me motivated because I hate talking about something and then not following through.

Finally, as you can see on the left, I've joined the Twitter revolution. What's that you say? The Twitter revolution was in 2006? Oh well. If I manage to get an iPhone, just imagine the inane details of my life that you'll be subjected to: "Sitting at a red light on the way to the bank!" or "Watching my kid wander around the park and pick up cigarette butts!"

I know. I can hardly wait.

Buttery Nikon goodness

Oh internets, I am all a-twitter. Your friend and mine, Tootie, you know the one, is entering the brave new world of DSLR-dom via my Nikon D70. I, therefore, am movin' on up in said -dom. First I went really insane and was going to dooce it up again with the Canon 5D, but quickly came to my senses. Clearly, the Slav does not need that much camera. So then I set my sights on the Nikon D200, but I went and checked it out at a local store and came to the conclusion that it, also, is much fancier than the Slav. Finally I settled on the Nikon D80 cause it's significantly less expensive but has almost the exact same guts as the D200. Plus it maintains all the auto-presets of the D70 so BK will still be able to use it.

Though I am excited about the D80, oh yes I am, I am even more excited about the Nikon 17-55mm f/2.8 lens that will arrive some time next month. Oh sweet mother. I think buying this lens forces me to now refer to camera lenses as "glass," oh-most-pretentious of photographer lingo. Next thing you know I'll be throwing around "bokeh" with the best of them, and won't I just be the fanciest girl this side of Mississippi.

And just because when I go all out, I go all out, I will also soon be the proud owner of the Crumpler Sinking Barge, which has been on my amazon wish list for over a year now, so can't call that one an impulse buy. (I own the McBain's Lovechild for my trusty old iBook -- which has gotten much use over the past few months what with the MacBook Pro woes DAMMIT I WASN'T GOING TO MENTION IT IN THIS POST -- and I love it.) Aaaand, I finally got a Speedlight, so I can play with the bounce flash big kids now instead of just yapping around and nipping at their ankles.

Ok, I think that is it. Expect marvels of photographic excellence to be posted here soon. In the meantime I leave you with this picture of my kid, who I promise has had a haircut since:

If this post was a casserole it wouldn't be very tasty

yucking it up
Originally uploaded by *Karo*.

Hi pork chops! Guess what? I done got my baby enrolled in daycare at the local JCC three mornings a week starting next month. Think of it! Twelve oh-so luxurious, child-free hours a week during which I can lay around on the couch stuffing my maw with those proverbial bon-bons do work and go to the gym. Plus, the whole interacting with other human beings his own age has got to be good for the little scamp, right? Right!

Volvo XC90
Originally uploaded by *Karo*.

I also got a ... brand new car! My S40's lease was up soon so the nice people at the Volvo dealership were kind enough to let me pay them even more money monthly for a bigger car that beeps ever-so fearsomely at me if it thinks I'm about to back up into something. The stereo system also has an auxilliary input for that iPod that I never use any more, and plays mp3 CDs. Who needs that iPod when I can have upwards of 1,000 songs in my six-disc changer! Man oh manischewitz, am I ever living now.

I don't even really want to mention it, but since I've been faithfully chronicling my MacBook Pro saga for posterity, I guess I shouldn't omit the fact that I am now on MBP number 4. After my last post I found out that number three had a faulty RAM bay, so I couldn't install my additional memory. So I had to mail it in, and after it came back it started the whole not-sleeping-when-the-lid-is-closed thing that number one used to do, oh joy of joys. I know, right? It'd almost be funny if it weren't so pathetic. The cow I ended up with in tier-two AppleCare kept insisting that it was software related, even though it only started happening after I got the machine back from the repair depot. After the whole litany of "fixes" ending with and archive and install didn't fix it, I went back to the Apple Store and gave it to them, because I had a feeling she was going to make me wipe the hard drive clean next. Anyway, the long and short is that the geniuses replaced it. Again. This one's trackpad button is a little on the wonky side and sometimes doesn't register clicks, but I'm going to ignore that for now because I'm just so disgusted with the whole mess.

green shoes
Originally uploaded by *Karo*.

Oh! So I came across this awesome deal for the Canon SD1000, and because I'm an idiot and cannot pass up a good tech deal I bought one to replace my old point-and-shoot Canon S230. Among other things, it has much better video-taking capabilities than the S230, but it can also do this. --->

Listen up, Dallas! I am now ready to be your crappy "artistic" wedding photographer. Please allow me to take stunning black-and-white photos of your flower girl kissing the ring bearer, and my camera will color up those red flowers she's holding! These priceless and fancy memories can be yours to hang on the wall next to your Thomas Kinkades for the low, low price of two thousand U.S. dollars!

Finally, those of you reading the Buffy Season Eight comic book, or those who aren't and don't mind being spoiled: how awesome is this? Check out J-Dub sticking it to the shippers. Good times.

Blah blah blah laptop problems blah

Holy crap on a stick internets, am I ever tired of talking about my laptop. I can only imagine how tired you must be of hearing about it. But we shall perservere!

As I mentioned a couple of months ago, my mother-in-law recently retired and was in the market for a laptop. Over Easter she became the proud owner of my MacBook Pro, seemingly cured of its inability to sleep upon lid closure. I then ran out and upgraded to a MacBook Pro Core 2 Duo and was happy with it for all of two weeks before (shock!), it started to reboot when I'd close the lid. But only sometimes. And on days that end in "y."

Truly, internets, I am cursed. Luckily, though, my local Genius opted to replace the whole machine (don't even get me started on why that was ok this time around but not for the 6 months I was saddled with problematic MBP #1). I guess the lesson here is to have your machine repaired in-store instead of dealing with Apple Care over the phone? *shrug* I dunno. All's I know is that I'm now on MBP number three and if something funny starts happening with this one when I close the lid, I'm throwing in my iTowel.

Wherein I give you, reader, a few more reasons to sneer in my general direction

My MacBook Pro arrived back home today with its logic board replaced. They also replaced the topcase assembly, which is pretty funny considering the topcase assembly was replaced less than a month ago, last time I sent the MBP in. Now, me, if I were a tech at the repair facility and I was working on a machine that had been sent again for a problem that remained unfixed, I might actually read the notes from the previous repair. But hey, that's just me. Perhaps Apple has a huge overstock of MBP topcase assemblies and they're replacing them on every unit that comes through the repair center. Maybe.

So now the wait begins. The first time I shut the lid on this bad boy and it doesn't go to sleep, I'm going to be on the horn to executive relations faster than you can say, "Help me, Steve Jobs; you're my only hope."



By way of congratulating Apple on getting my laptop back to me, I wandered on over to my local Apple store this afternoon and bought the new Apple TV. Why, you ask? Because I am a sucker. Duh. On the bright side, if you've been itching for a widescreen, HD slideshow of my son (and you know you have), come on over!

The new season begins...today!
Originally uploaded by macslost.

Have we discussed the Buffy comics yet, interwebs? Run, do not walk, to your local nerd emporium comic book store and pick up the first issue, cause that shit is goooood. Although I have to say, I don't know how comic book fans (BK!) do it, cause one issue is like ¼ of a TV episode and then you have to wait a whole month to see what happens next. What's that all about? I for one would be willing to pay to have them speed that shit up. Then again, I'm also the person who bought the variant cover of the first issue and will be buying the slightly different, second-printing cover as well (much to BK's chagrin). So maybe I'm not really the person to ask. (Along these same lines -- only not -- I also think that professional sports games should end early if the margin between the scores is an preset, impossible to overcome amount. Yes, I have lots of opinions. Just ask me.)

Clare and Baxter
Originally uploaded by *Karo*.

Since I'm in an dork-tasticly oversharing kind of mood, I should also note that I not only bought my first-ever comic book this month, I also attended my first-ever comic book convention, where I met Clare Kramer, a.k.a. Glorificus. Here she is with Baxter. As you can see, he just taking a breather between screams, which is merely a fitting reaction to close proximity to a hellgod, and not at all the onset of the terrible twos seven months early. RIGHT???

Fed up

fed up
Originally uploaded by *Karo*.

For the first time in my life, I wish I were a big-time fancy blogger. Because then my MBP post would have been dugg or some shit, and Steve Jobs' minions would be falling over themselves to help a Slav out so I'd stop giving Apple bad e-press. However, I wield no authori-tay whatsoever over the interwebs; I could voice my laptop woes all the live-long day and call Steve Jobs a big, pink monkey's butt and it would make no difference.

As you may have guessed, I am still disgruntled. My laptop is still at the repair center, still listed as on hold, needing more information. Yesterday I talked to a Tier 2 rep who assured me that I should see some progress within 24 hours, but it appears as though she was wrong, wrong, wrong. I'm pretty much out of ideas at this point as to what I can do to get a fully-functioning laptop in my hands.

Update: A few hours ago, in response to my emails and calls, I received a phone call from one Melissa of Apple's executive relations. She assured me that even though the status of my laptop was listed as on hold, constant diagnostic tests were being run on it to try to replicate the problem, which the techs had yet to do. I just hope they realize they need to leave it on for 24 hours or so for the problem to rear its ugly head again after a restart. Anyway, that's neither here nor there, because Melissa assured me that if the laptop was returned to me again unfixed they would "take the next step" which I assume is Applespeak for "replace your gimpy-ass laptop." Now we just have to see how long it takes for me to actually get the laptop back.

After six months, it was time for the Angry Letter

From: Karo
Date: March 21, 2007 5:00:42 PM CDT
To: steve@apple.com
Subject: Extreme dissatisfaction with my MacBook Pro and AppleCare service

To Whom it May Concern:

Please review the following tale of woe regarding a service issue I have with my MacBook Pro with AppleCare (serial Wxxxxxxxxxx). The issue at hand: My MacBook Pro does not go into sleep mode automatically when the lid is closed.

This seemingly innocuous and small problem has yet to be fixed after six months of phone calls to AppleCare and after sending my laptop away for repair. Twice. I have reset a small army's worth of PRAM and PMU. The issue is always "fixed." But it always comes back. I am tired of waking up to a drained battery in the morning, tired of making call after call to AppleCare, and after today's stunning incompetence on the part of Apple's phone support, I am simply fed up.

***

My current service (Dxxxxxxxx) was requested on Wednesday, March 14. My DHL box arrived Friday the 16th, and the laptop was dropped of at the local DHL facility Monday the 19th. Service was requested when it became clear that issue above had not been fixed last time computer had been sent in (dispatch number Dxxxxxxxx) in late February.

I checked the repair status online on the morning of Tuesday the 20th. It said the issue was being diagnosed. At approximately noon the message changed to "on hold -- need information." I assumed if the information was needed from me, I would be contacted. I was not, so the evening of the 20th I called and was told that the information was not needed from me, but from a specialist.

Wednesday the 21st the message remained the same. Around noon I called again. I provided the woman with whom I spoke the serial number, dispatch number, and case number. She entered every number incorrectly. After eventually accessing my file, she told me there was nothing more she could tell me.

I then did research on Apple's web site and found that the "on hold -- need information" message means that additional information is needed from the customer. I call back again. This time I am transferred directly to someone in the dispatch department (why did this not happen the first two times I called?). I am told that the problem is that the technicians can not replicate the problem, which reads as, "computer does not sleep."

(When I requested service on the 14th I repeated over and over again that that is not the issue. The agent on the phone would read back to me, "computer does not sleep" and I would correct her. Multiple times. Yet the issue was still transcribed incorrectly.)

I once again clarify the issue. I repeat, as I have countless times, that I have reset my PRAM and PMU and that the problem goes away, but only temporarily. It always comes back, usually after about 24 hours (although it was two weeks after it was returned to me when I sent it in for service last month). I provided the agent with the thread number in Apple discussions (http://discussions.apple.com/thread.jspa?threadID=636696&tstart=30) which has over 250 replies, all people who have the same problem. I provide the agent with a case and dispatch number of another MacBook Pro that had the same problem -- 74439066 (repair ID D10869804).

Please note that I was never notified via email that additional information was needed from me. In fact, my Apple ID was never linked to this service. If I had not checked the repair status online myself, repeatedly, who knows how long the laptop would have sat there at the service center, waiting for additional information.

It is now three and a half hours later, when I check the status online, the message remains "on hold -- need information."

***

To sum up, here are the problems my MacBook Pro has had since I was apparently foolish enough to order a new product it the day it was announced:

* Power adapter has been replaced. Twice.
* Battery bulged, warped the case, and was replaced.
* A two inch "smear" was visible on the screen against dark backgrounds.
* Corrosion of the topcase resulted in black spotting along the left wristrest.
* Aforementioned warping resulted in separation of topcase from side panel.
* DVD player refused to play all but brand-new, untouched disks. Any smudge or scratch rendered the disk unplayable.
* Lid of laptop would close on its own if positioned at an angle of less than about 40 degrees.

In Apple's defense, all issues were quickly taken care of. All except this one niggling issue that has plagued me for months, ever since the release of 10.4.8 update six months ago. I realize this problem is not a large one; however, a $2000 laptop should work as advertised. A $350 extended warranty should fix any issues promptly. Every time I send the laptop away I am left without the machine I work from home on. Every phone call that I make to AppleCare is time that I cannot get back.

I am not unreasonable; I understand computers will have problems. But so many in the span of just over a year? All I want is my MacBook Pro to work as it should. Please ensure that when it or its replacement arrives back from the service center the machine will go to sleep when the lid is closed and that the problem does not come back.

I have have owned three Apple laptops and one desktop since 1994, and I have worked on Macs in the office since 2000. What a shame it would be if Apple lost me as a customer and an enormous word-of-mouth proponent of its hardware over an issue as trivial as this one.

Sincerely,
Karo

Post-Oscar thoughts on cinema

Apple, consider yourself in my good graces again. I dropped my Macbook Pro off at a DHL facility last Wednesday and got it back yesterday morning, with everything fixed. Houston repair center service technician number 31514, I salute you. I am enjoying the hell out of my DSPL, 15.4", WXGA++, AG, CHIMEI, M1. Whatever the hell that is. (New screen, I'm assuming?)

Internets, let's discuss the cinema. Namely, could someone solve the mystery of why movies that are regarded as "good" have to be so fucking depressing 95% of the time? What's with the suffering? The over-the-top brutality? Is it not possible to make an engaging film that is in some way extraordinary and will make you think without the pain and torture? Granted, the last few movies I've seen were Pan's Labyrinth, The Departed, and Babel, so maybe I'm due for a break. Check out what one Mr. Thomas Dunham has to say in his amazon.com review of Babel:

What a depressing film. This film is basically about a highly unlikey series of unfortunate events occuring to a small group of people, with each event more depressing and unbelievable than the last. It's an emotional snuff film, offering only a voyeuristic trip into human misery. If you like to watch people suffer at the mercy of situations beyond their control, then then film is for you!

About midway through this film it began to strike me almost as a parady of itself; the never-ending chain of gut-wrenching, anguishing events were truly over-the-top. The same movie could have been made simply by filming little children as their pet-kittens are pryed from their hands, and then thrown out the window into oncoming traffic. Do we really need a film to tell us how random and cruel life can be, or have people forgotten?

Now, I will admit that since Baxter came along I have become an enormous weenie, but still. Doesn't life throw enough sadness our way that we don't need to sit through one man killing another man by beating his nose back into his head with a beer bottle? What does that teach us? Why is our choice so often either one of these cinematic reminders of man's capacity to be monsterous or You, Me, and Dupree?

Most unforgivable hubris

I've somehow miraculously managed not to infect anyone with my latest mucous-fest

I was punished, of course. My own cold extended into a three-week long ordeal which involved more boxes of Plus Doux Kleenex than you could possibly imagine, and a cough so disgustingly wet it defied description. More punishment arrived in the form of a sick baby, which quickly morphed into sick baby who wailed and gnashed all night long. Enter said baby's first-ever ear infection. Then there was solo baby-wrangling caused by BK's business trip to New York, and then more solo baby-wrangling caused by BK being snowed in on said business trip. Finally, a sick BK. However! We all appear to be on the mend and I have made promises to the baby Jesus, many promises, and hopefully I will be punished no more. Because, fuck, these past few weeks have sucked.

I think that about does it for the Snot Report, so let's move on to Tales of Karo's Laptop, horror stories so frightening and perverse that they make even the boldest fireside camper run screaming into the woods. I have done the unthinkable and sent my MacBook Pro in for repair. Six repairs, actually, including:

• A two-inch long "smudge" on my monitor that appears only against dark backgrounds. I'm not the only one.
• Remember my bulging battery? That sucker actually warped my laptop case.
• Black spots are beginning to appear on my left wrist rest. Happy fun corrosion times!
• The lid falls shut on its own!
• The laptop no longer goes to sleep when the lid is closed. Look! 238 replies since September and yet no one I've talked to at Apple Care has ever heard of this problem.
• The DVD player refuses to play DVDs if they're even the slightest bit smudged. It laughs at any that have even a hint of a scratch.

The good news is that Apple has received my laptop and has ordered a mystery part (so much for my secret dream of them totaling it and giving me a new one). Now we'll just have to see how long it takes for them to send it back to me and how many of the six issues will have been resolved.

I cannot begin to tell you how much pantwetting occurred in the last two hours

OMFG!!!!!111!!