Ruminating Slav

Now I wish we'd eaten there and had some oysters

Last night BK and I had a Hott Date -- first we ate some sushi in the presence of Dallas' beautiful people (none of whom have anything as pedestrian as a baby, I'm sure) and concluded that the beautiful people like it way too loud in their restaurants. On the way to the movie theatre we realized neither of us was particularly excited to see Clerks II (although Kevin Smith ripping Joel Siegal a new one on his MySpace page is pretty funny) so we ended up at The Oceanaire for drinks and dessert. The dessert was monstrous -- a couple of those bad boys would fix Lebanon's current humanitarian crisis right up. Well, just the food shortage aspect. It was big, but not big enough to provide shelter from Iraqi bombs.

Right!

Anyway. When we first got to the restaurant we ran into some coworkers of BK's, one of whom was all palsy with the bartender and gave him strict instructions to treat us right. Next thing we know we've got two glasses of champagne sitting in front of us, and when that's all gone we order more cause, you know, champagne. It's good like that. Thank god treating us right consisted of comping those first two glasses, though, cause we done drank $80 worth of champagne, people. Sweet fancy moses! It wasn't even the good stuff.

Anyone who has three grand burning a hole in their pocket, feel free to buy me this.

Baxter's first political rally

first political rally
Originally uploaded by *Karo*.

Check out Little B at his very first ever political rally, the Countdown to Victory in 2006 here in Dallas. There were hot dogs! And balloon animals! And a lady with two real-life donkeys!

Guests of a less asinine nature included U.S. Senators Harry Reid, Joseph Biden, and Barack Obama.

Warm, because Karo does not enjoy the chilled soups

I hope all Slav readers had a good weekend, be it of the two- or three-day variety. Mine was gloriously lazy -- Saturday night we had a coworker of BK's over for dinner along with his girlfriend, and I will say without a bit of shame that I did not lift a pinkie to help with dinner preparations. Before you delete your Slav RSS feed in disgust, let me defend myself: I did clean the house before the dinner and clean up after the dinner. I just did not cook the dinner, which, by the way, was fabulous 'cause my man, he can COOK. There was vichyssoise, and monkfish (which BK tells me is sometimes referred to as "poor man's lobster," but apparently only if you catch it yourself and not buy 2 lbs. of it for $24 at Central Market), and TARTLETS (also CM). Lord do I ever love me a key lime tartlet. We're having one of my co-workers and her husband over in a couple of weekends (can you tell we're trying to be all non-baby and shit in these last few non-baby weeks?), and now I feel like the gauntlet has been thrown. Plus, my coworker is a vegetarian, so my menu choices are more limited. Goddamn vegetarians.

I'm not going to address the tragedy our country has found itself in the midst of in the past week here. What can I say that others haven't said better? Suffice it to say that I hope everyone who, like me, has been lucky enough to not have lost anyone, has taken a moment in recent days to hold tight their loved ones, both two- and four-legged.

Never, ever cross the customer service reps

When Twink IM'ed me this, I honestly thought it was from The Onion. But no:

In another case, Peoples Energy customer Jefferoy Barnes started getting letters addressed to "Jeffery Scrotum Bag Barnes."

Please tell me this is not socially acceptable

I heard a piece on the the local public radio station this morning about the current controversy surrounding Grand Praire public schools adopting a particular Bible curriculum. Here is a quote from one Mr. Hiram Sasser, director of litigation at the Liberty Legal Institute of Plano:

Everyone's come to the same conclusion, that this curriculum was perfectly fine. It meshes well with the educational environment of a school, and it's beneficial, and the Supreme Court has always said it's beneficial for the kids to learn about the Bible. So anyone who's against this has just got to be French.

A match made in heaven

How awesome would it be if Janet Miller and Lil' Kim were cellmates? Think of the conversations!

Racial snub, my ass

Can someone please explain to me why a store needs to issue an official apology for turning a customer away 15 MINUTES AFTER CLOSING? If I were Oprah and decided that I wanted to buy, I dunno, dog food at one in the morning, would Petsmart issue me an official apology for being closed? WTF?

NPR: Fewer Boys Being Born in America

Did anyone else hear this story on NPR this morning? The basic gist was that historically, there have always been slightly more boys born than girls, nature's way of adjusting for the fact that males are more likely to die in all stages of life. But apparently the difference is now beecoming smaller (I think the stats they gave were something like 1,055 boys to 1,000 girls some years ago and now 1,048 boys to 1,000 girls). Anyway, the part that I found most interesting were the theories of why this is happening -- one of them states that single mothers are more likely to have daughters because they require less nutrition (10% fewer calories required in utero, I think they said -- wow!) and less energy to raise. So now that there are more single mothers, there are more females being born. I find it fascinating that a mother's awareness that she will be raising a child alone can have an impact on gender determination -- if that's the case, it's cool!

Way to go, Tulsa

This might be the dumbest fucking thing I've heard in a long time, which, given the current state of Our Great Nation, is saying a lot.

A letter to Brad Pitt

Hey Brad!

How's it going? I know, I know, it's been a while since we last talked. Listen! I saw you get interviewed by Diane Sawyer last night on Primetime Live. Yeah! Brad, I gotta say, the work you're doing to promote awareness about poverty and disease in Africa is just great. You know that one part of the show last night, where you were talking about visiting the orphanage with all the AIDS babies who never get held because there's just not enough caretakers? Man, that had me crying on the couch, Brad, seriously. Big fatty AIDS-baby tears. Good work, dude.

So listen. I saw that Diane was trying to get you to spill the beans about you and Angelina, and what's going on there, but you weren't having any of it. You were all, "there's a bounty on my head!" and talking about how some things you just need to keep private and for yourself. That's cool, Brad, that's cool. We of the Internets hear you.

But Brad, look. When I read the next day about the 60-PAGE BRANGELINA PHOTO SPREAD in W magazine, it demolishes any shred of credibility you may have been lucky enough to salvage. You SUCK, Brad. If you want people to lay off you and Angelina, here's an idea: don't appear together with some rented-ass kids in 60 pages worth of glossy photos pretending to be a 1960s suburban married couple.

Honestly.

Love,
Karo